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I stumbled upon the pain hustlers book when I wasn’t looking for it. Roaming around the pre-owned books shop, where each cover or title page expressed the journey from one reader to another. I picked one subtly and without any second thought. The title was aggressively odd, but it remained with me.  That day, something in me shifted, not because the book was poetic or soft. In fact, it wasn’t. It was sharp, unrelenting, and raw. And I needed that.

Reading Through Bruises

Life has a way of knocking the breath out of us. Not always in big cinematic ways, but through small blows—bills you didn’t expect, jobs that don’t call back, family that forgets your birthday. In the months before I read the book, I was grappling with loss in a form I hadn’t been ready for.

My younger brother died suddenly. The world has shifted and become both quiet and loud, all at the same time. I was caught up in the noise of people’s well-meaning, while I could hardly even hear my own thoughts. Everyone recommends books on dealing with grief, and I read many. Most tried to soothe. Some used a metaphor. A few made me cry, but none made me angry—until this one.

And surprisingly, anger was what finally gave me room to feel.

Not Just a Story, But a Mirror

The pain hustlers is technically a novel, but that barely captures it. It’s a lens—grim, yes—but also unflinching. The characters don’t behave well, and that’s the point. They manipulate, they claw their way up systems designed to reward greed. But through that chaos, you see real people wrestling with invisible pain. The kind that doesn’t have a diagnosis.

At some point midway, I found myself pausing and whispering, “That’s me.” Not because I’ve sold out or become ruthless, but because I’ve also faked being okay just to function. I’ve swallowed my hurt to survive another meeting. I’ve put on makeup when I couldn’t afford therapy.

That’s what good writing does—it doesn’t comfort, it confronts. Some of the best books on grief don’t look like grief guides at all. They hide their lessons inside broken characters.

This book reminded me that pain, when named honestly, stops owning you.

Pain, Hustled or Otherwise

I started journaling after I finished it. Not the neat kind, with dates and gratitude lists. No, mine was messy. Pen stutters, capital letters where they didn’t belong, swearing, even drawings. There was a kind of therapy in it. A strange clarity, like suddenly seeing through fog.

The pain hustlers stories don’t pretend that pain goes away. Instead, it asks—what are you willing to risk just to not feel it anymore?

That line hit me hard. I remembered all the ways I’d hustled through pain. Overworking. Over-explaining. Even over-helping others, just to feel needed. Reading this was not the experience of being in a therapist’s office.  It was more the experience of sitting across from someone who had nothing to lose and was going to tell the truth. 

For the first time, having hurt didn’t make me feel weak. I felt… awake.

That realization reminded me of another read—the explain pain book. Though it’s more science-based, it broke down how pain isn’t always about injury. Sometimes, it’s about memory. About fear. About how our bodies scream for help long after the wound has closed.

And sometimes, to heal, you need stories more than diagrams.

The Truth No One Talks About

We rarely say it out loud, but there’s a certain shame in grieving too long. People start to shift. They stop asking how you are, not because they don’t care, but because they assume you should be “better.” They want you to be productive again. Smiling again.

But healing isn’t a staircase. It’s a forest. The pain hustlers book doesn’t offer redemption. No clear villains. No satisfying revenge. But it does offer reality. And strangely, that’s what helped me forgive myself for not being okay.

Not all pain needs to be fixed. Some just want to be witnessed.

Final Pages, First Steps

By the time I finished the book, I hadn’t become someone new. I didn’t have a five-year plan or a morning routine. But I had something else—permission. To be broken. Taking up space in that state. Letting people know I wasn’t ready yet.

And more than that, I remembered how much stories matter. Even the brutal ones. Maybe especially the brutal ones.

Because healing doesn’t always come from sunlight. Sometimes it comes from the fire.

If you’re walking through something heavy and the usual books on dealing with grief aren’t cutting through, try something different. Pick a book that doesn’t pretend to be nice. One that pushes back. Like the explain pain book, but with the emotional sledgehammer of fiction.

Holding the Pain Without Drowning in It

Reading the pain hustlers book didn’t heal me. That’s not what books do. But it gave me a language for something I didn’t know how to say.

And that’s something.

Pain never leaves you as it found you. It can stretch you, it can reshape you. But if you’re fortunate, or perhaps just inclined to be open, it can also help you learn how to stay when everything inside you wants to run.

You may never move past it, but you can learn to stay with it and keep on walking.

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